Monday, December 24, 2007

I can't be the Grinch

I hadn't realized this would be the case when I took on this crazy business, but for the first time in my life I have been accused of ruining several people's Christmas dreams this year. Of course, I didn't ruin Christmas fun or family time, didn't overcook a meal, nor did I force my staff to work overtime during this season, but my company does still send bills in December, and some are even due on Christmas Day. That cuts into the gift budget and I have officially ruined Christmas for several people. In the past, my wife was a loan originator and she too ruined Christmas for many a child when her underwriters denied loans to customers. And, even if I didn't ruin Christmas, I have had my head torn off by several people who are really stressed this time of year.

It seems that money, or the lack thereof, is the number one concern of many people during a time of year that might be better spent if we took more time off of work, spent more time with family reflecting on the year that passed and planning for the next year. Of course we couldn't outspend our income by 2.2% each year if we did that. Plus, the economy would surely crash due to low sales at major retailers and life might cease to exist if we didn't over do it this year. All of a sudden we are obligated to overspend during the Holidays just to keep this country on track. I hope you and I didn't drop the ball this year.

Of course, I love gift giving (I am a little more partial to gift receiving), but I don't view the dollar value of the gift as a measurement of the strength of my relationship or feelings for the other person. I was raised to believe that my parents gave the best Christmas they could out of love and not obligation. It was a time to make sure I understood why they worked so hard during the other 364 days...to help my siblings and me build a better life than they had. Christmas morning was a slow, family focused, and ultimately fun event. Probably the longest my siblings and I sat in the same room all year long. I remember few gifts that I received, but I do remember that my older sister never ripped wrapping paper, my little sister counted her gifts vs everyone else's, I sat in a specific chair every year, my brother and I got a lot of the same clothes in different colors, mom insisted that we enter the living room at the same time to see what Santa brought, and dad gave several speeches about why we did all of these things in such a drawn out manner and how much we meant to my mom and him.

As most first time parents, my wife and I were really excited to do our first family Christmas shopping trip. Of course, the stores were not flowing with Christmas cheer nor decorations for that matter. It was not magical, but rather it was a little like walking through a warehouse in many cases. I was hoping for a trip like the one on "A Christmas Story" ending with a visit to Santa, maybe a ride down an over sized slide, but it was a little different. In the end, my wife and I had fun together and made it a wonderful date, but we were constantly surrounded by fighting, arguments about over spending, and even profanity at The Children's Place. We all have the desire to give the best gifts to our children, believe it or not, it is hard-wired into our DNA. That desire to shower our children with the best gifts in the world is seen in the reason that we celebrate this Season...God's giving His son for the salvation of mankind. But God didn't give us expensive toys, or the latest fashionable article of clothing, He gave us the best gift He could to improve our lives. I understand that lesson more now than ever before.

My daughter is getting some great gifts this year, but I am hoping that the message of why her mother and I want to shower her with the best of everything we have to offer is what stays with her, not the memory of a toy that we pulled off the shelf of a fairly dirty toy store. We have dedicated ourselves to providing a great life to our kids, we strive 365 days a year to show that as do most parents, and it is my hope that my children will never confuse how much I love them with how many gifts I am able or willing to give during Christmas. By letting that be the focus of my trip and not focusing on which item would best indicate to a toddler that I love her, I was able to simply enjoy the experience (despite the grumpy people around me).

I wish all of you the Merriest Christmas and best wishes for a Happy and Healthy New Year.

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